FOOD FOR THOUGHT

 

 

“Don’t knock masturbation, it’s sex with someone I love.”

~Woody Allen

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Sex is good, but it’s not the real thing. ”
~Adam Carolla

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“It is better to conquer yourself than to win a thousand battles. Then the victory is yours. It cannot be taken from you, not by angels or by demons, heaven or hell.”
~The Buddha

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Salvation lies within.”
~The Shawshank Redemption

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Make love, not war”
~John Lennon

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“From the moment I was six I felt sexy. And let me tell you it was hell, sheer hell, waiting to do something about it.”
~Bette Davis

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Sometimes you just gotta say what the fuck. What the fuck gives you freedom.”
~Risky Business

 

 

 

 

 

 

“When authorities warn you of the sinfulness of sex, there is an important lesson to be learned. Do not have sex with the authorities.”

~Matt Groening

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“I’m such a good lover because I practice a lot on my own.”
~Woody Allen

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. ‘Yes’ is the answer.”
~Swami X

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Life without sex might be safer but it would be unbearably dull. It is the sex instinct which makes women seem beautiful, which they are once in a blue moon, and men seem wise and brave, which they never are at all. Throttle it, denaturalize it, take it away, and human existence would be reduced to the prosaic, laborious, boresome, imbecile level of life in an anthill.”
~Henry Louis Mencken

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“The good thing about masturbation is that you don’t have to get dressed up for it.”
~Truman Capote

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“You choke the chicken before any big date, don’t you? Tell me you spank the monkey before any big date. Oh my God, he doesn’t flog the dolphin before a big date. Are you crazy? That’s like going out there with a loaded gun!”
~There’s Something About Mary

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“If you use the electric vibrator near water, you will come and go at the same time.”
~Louise Sammons

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“We have reason to believe that man first walked upright to free his hands for masturbation.”
~Lily Tomlin

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“The tragedy is when you’ve got sex in the head instead of down where it belongs.”
~D.H. Lawrence

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Why do you stay in prison when the door is so wide open?”
~Rumi

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don’t have a good partner, you’d better have a good hand.”
~Woody Allen

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Masturbation: the primary sexual activity of mankind. In the nineteenth century it was a disease; in the twentieth, it’s a cure.”
~Thomas Szasz

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Nothing risqué, nothing gained.”
~Alexander Woollcott