The World Cup is upon us, and even guys and gals out there who don’t give a shit about sports can agree on one thing– those soccer players are fucking sexy. But while they may have no problem getting laid, are they allowed to? The folks at PolicyMic posted a piece yesterday breaking down the sexual rules governing each soccer (or football to the rest of the world) team by country. While some, including the Ancient Greeks, believed that carnal activities deplete your energy and can poorly affect performance (that sax player from Seinfeld trying to play after boning Elaine comes to mind), others find that the tension release actually helps them to relax and allows for optimum playing. Here’s the policy for 8 different teams competing this year:
Yes. The U.S. national team coach said this week, “I think we have a group of guys together and an environment together that is very open, very casual. But once we go on the field for training and also for the games, we are very serious and down to business.”
Yes. (Surprising anyone?) Manager Didier Deschamps says that sex is allowed, but “it all depends on where, how and how much… I don’t want them to be cut off from the outside world.”
Maybe. As long as visits happen within the training and match schedule, families and partners can come to Brazil. Back in 2010 though, coach Fabio Capello swore to uphold the sex ban by monitoring the players through their hotel t.v. sets. Creepy.
Maybe. Super Eagles coach Stephen Keshi was advised by former team captain and manager Christian Chukwu to keep players away from temptation, though it’s not clear whether an official ban has been put in place. Keshi says, “In my days as a player, even as a coach, I made it a point of duty to stay away from women, because sex has a lot of spiritual things attached to it.”
Depends. Luiz Felipe Scolari says players can engage in “normal intercourse” (vanilla?) but acrobatic sex is not permitted.
No. Manager Safet Susic: “They can find another solution, they can even masturbate if they want… I am not interested what the other coaches do. This is not a holiday trip: We are there to play football at the World Cup.”
No. Coach Jorge Sampaoli has said no sex (and no soda).
No. Manager Miguel Herrera says that “If a player can’t go one month or 20 days without having sexual relations, then they are not prepared to be a professional player,” which seems harsh but understandable considering the prostitution scandals that have rocked their team. Well there you have it. And if you haven’t seen the very sexy/let’s fuck shit up World Cup promo that Beats put out yesterday, take 5 minutes and watch it NOW. It’ll blow your socks off.